January 17, 2023

2022


Is it too late to write this post?

I guess not as we can always look back and assess our failures and achievements anytime.

I put failures first always as there are many. Lets not talk about them today.

Achievements happen irregularly and when they do its like stumbling upon some serendipitous finds.

Ok. that’s me.

Now coming back to the main topic – 2022.

I can happily say that it was a Year of Achievements. Not momentous or mammoth. But little joys and minor accomplishments which may seem meaningless and mundane. But for me they are not as these tasks have taken time to complete after undue procrastination.

These are:

(i) Got my flat painted and polished after almost ten years. Reason ? Mother being severely bronchial and several times on Oxygen support. I was afraid that the smell of the paint and polish might affect her adversely. But minimal maintenance was rendering the flat unlivable. So keeping fingers crossed took the leap. Nothing majorly untoward happened. Thank God!!

(ii) Got the overhead water tank replaced almost at the point of bursting. Massive job! Wondering how to get it done. But my plumber (a good guy) eased my worries. Now with a bigger tank in place the water issues have got resolved to a large extent.

(iii) House maintenance is an ongoing process. However got a few crucial ones done like floor grinding (mainly balcony and the open space at the back), replacement of kitchen slab (partly) etc. A few are still pending. May be this year….

(iv) At the office front – completed the stipulated number of e-courses which was part of the e-learning module I have spoken about in my earlier blog on Curse of Corona – Part II. These were to be finished by a certain timeline. Finished much before. Guess what the number was? EIGHTY!! Can you beat that ? But I am glad I did and still continuing with the rest.

(v) Re-connected with an old school friend after aeons and now we talk often on phone. Resolved to meet this year for sure (as we both keep very busy and stay at extreme ends).

(vi) Visited Hardwar. In fact I have not moved out of Delhi since 2008. So, this was really a get-away in the true sense and sorely needed. We (me and another friend) started early morning and came back the same evening. She had to perform a short ritual by the Ganges. After that we just sat on the steps leading to the Ghaat (river bank) and enjoyed the cool breeze and some heart-to-heart chat. It was so pleasant and peaceful even in the hot and dry afternoon.

(vii) Resumed reading and finished quite a few books. Am a slow reader and often not able to keep regular reading time. But even if there was a break in between I made it a point to get back to the unfinished read. Also, taken to a new author – T M Logan – and am hooked to his racy writings. I recommend him to all Mystery Lovers. Mind it I am a very selective reader and rarely read outside the domain of preferred writers. I bumped into Logan quite accidently on Kindle Prime Reading and then there was no looking back. After The Holiday, I am into Lies – second book by Logan. 🙂

(viii) After my driver left (because of heart problem. Poor chap! He is so young!) started commuting by the Metro i.e. from office to home in the evenings. Metro can be very stuffy at times and getting a seat is dependent on others being kind to you. But it has shortened the commuting time. I can avoid the on-road traffic. I get a good fifteen minutes walk from office to the station and again from junction to junction (at the changing point). I can climb down the steps (though it was painful at first being a long time after). I can spend some time on kindle. Also, Metro is where I got lot of ideas for writing earlier. Now I can happily jot down my thoughts and many of my posts last year have birthed while journeying back home. Considering my medical issues, Metro was a tough choice that I made last year!!!

(viii) Started writing in my mother tongue i.e. Bangla. Was hesitant at first being out of touch with the language. But I was dying to….So revived my Bangla Blog with short pieces. Then the creative bug bit me hard and I embarked full fledged on writing short stories. And wonder of all wonders – these were well received when published on a popular site. I also won the Certificate of Literary Lieutenant!! Yooohooo….

(ix) Stopped binging on Web Series which has actually given me more time for reading. However, still there are cheat days. Fictions, in any form, fascinate me and I love to take refuge in the wildly exciting make believe world of narratives of different styles.

(x) Became a serious Wordler and Waffler. Words! Languages! Expressions! Have always attracted me. Wordle gave me an opportunity to test my vocab. Surprisingly, it also opened a vast arena of online word-gaming …..Quordle, Octordle, Waffle, Spelling Bee, Letter Boxed….and I went berserk!!!!

Whoops! A year full of activities.

Howsoever insignificant (i) to (x) may seem, these are very personal and a matter of pride to me.

Its good to take stock of things once in a while as it

(i) allows to tick off all the tasks done and

(ii) figure out what more remain to do

(iii) gives a sense of satisfaction

(iv) raises self esteem and confidence

(v) reveals the importance of planning and resolve

(vi) widens the horizon of future possibilities

With every such assessment one ……………………..grows !!!

Believing in CANI (Constant And Never-ending Improvement) does help.

I am sure much more was achieved last year. Will go on adding as I recall.

This post will keep on expanding, therefore, underscoring this is not the end.

So is life …..

Till then…

Traa…Laaa…Laaa

Pic from Google

Posted by on January 17, 2023 in A SHORT ESSAY and tagged , , , .

8 Comments

January 3, 2023

Oops!! It’s Me!!!


Those who wish to know how I look on the threshold of being a sexagenarian, this is is it….

😃😃😃 I fell in love with this Scream Mask since I saw the first of the Series. Remember Scream 1, 2 3….and how the murderer will be omnipresent in all the nooks and corners of deserted houses, school corridors and hostel rooms with a vicious looking knife in hand???

Now, now I don’t have any criminal agenda but the mask is too attractive. Believe me, apart from frightening people, it is very good protection from Corona Virus while traveling/ in congested areas. Better than the half masks – 3 Ply or N 95 – which makes one sweat, difficult to breathe in and once you breathe through that specs go foggy. I tried out this mask on one of the wintry days to cover my face against the chilly wind.

Since then it is not to be found. Seriously…

Whosoever stole it should return postscript as it was a gift to myself on my birthday.

Posted by on January 3, 2023 in HUMOUR and tagged , , .

7 Comments

January 1, 2023

How To Say Goodbye?


Stepping on to a New Year my foremost thought is how to say goodbye. I have been thinking a lot about this lately. Bidding adieu does not only mean parting ways it is much more than that.

This particular thought is more relevant because I will be superannuating from my Organization pretty soon. An Organization which has been my lifeline for almost more than thirty five years. I have grown working, quite literally, in this prestigious corporate sector of which I am very proud. I am sure this belongingness will never die though I will not be physically at my desk from nine to five. It is strange how we get attached to this abstract notion of being a part of an infrastructure howsoever mammoth and concrete be it. I have always been very aware of the fact that I am just a cog of a very huge machinery. The machinery may not remember me after a while but my contribution, though meagre, will remain as my signature and stamp in its continuity. Perhaps this is just my wishful thinking but I love to believe that it is so. The show must go on and it unstoppably will but somewhere I will be there in its rolling progress, if not in body then in spirit.

Parting from the old signifies opening up of a new chapter. It is the unwritten law by which life moves on to which perhaps we don’t give much thought. I recall the lyrics of Roger Whittekar’s famous song “the first time that we said hullo began our last goodbye.” Every sublimely beautiful moment has its transience embedded within. But it is more important to let go the darker memories – our baggage of remorse, repentance and guilt. So difficult that is. So painful to carry on with it as well. Life sustains on hope. With time all wounds heal. We learn to unlearn, forget and forgive. And one fine day we realize we are no longer burdened with our pasts.

However, no syllabus on Earth teaches us to deal with the ultimate truth- the eternal parting of our near and dear ones. Although we all know it is inevitable yet we struggle to come face to face with it. The present day focus is on living a meaningful and useful life because it is too short to spend on petty squabbles. All issues giving rise to friction are insignificant and to be considered momentary. Are they really?

It is morbid to dwell on death. Why? Is it our psyche to evade that which is formidable, unknown and leaves behind an enormous, unfilled vacuum? Recently, I saw a film which pivoted around this theme. A scattered urban family comes together on the mother’s untimely demise. The dysfunctional relationships prevent them from living fully that moment of final goodbye until a roaming dervish teaches them the importance of life and death. Accepting death is like coming back to your roots – the bare truths wherein all your worldly entrapments fall apart. Tagore, in many of his songs, has written about his preparedness to meet the end once his earthbound functions and duties are successfully completed. I think that is the best way to proceed towards afterlife with a sense of attainment without looking back.     

However, it is not the epilogue. There is much to achieve beyond. That is why it is said that this ever expanding cosmic play of which we are a miniscule part has no beginning, therefore, no end. It goes on till infinity and takes us forward along. That is how mere mortals are immortalized. That is how we all are amritasya putrah – the blessed offsprings of the deathless.

So finally there is no saying goodbye just floating on the currents of the river of life towards the gleefully soaring waves of an ocean of eternal existence. We die along! We live along!

Posted by on January 1, 2023 in A SHORT ESSAY and tagged , , , , .

2 Comments

December 19, 2022

Security Versus Trust


It was 2013 when the consultant Orthopaedician advised me not to use public conveyance for long distances including to and fro office. The over- crowded Metro was my traveling mode at that time which invariably involved a standing journey at least for an hour or more. Due to the pain and discomfort in my legs and lower back, driving my personal car was simply a no-no.

It was also the time when my mother, an octogenarian, got operated for breast cancer. A successful surgery does not imply end of all travails. Post-surgery treatments continued which resulted in more and more complications. She was in and out of hospital. The situation demanded readily available mode of conveyance for routine and more for exigent needs which seemed to be looming large all the time.

We decided to keep a driver. However, it took sometime before we got one. The boy who came to be appointed was known to one of the handymen of our Block whom we knew for years. So we took it for granted that his recommendation was indubitable.

As a family we deeply believe in the intrinsic goodness of human soul. All house helps are considered part of an extended family and we are with them in their times of joy and grief. They have also been with us for countless years without giving us any opportunity to question their integrity. However, sadly, all are not made out of the same mould and kindness can be taken as weakness and manipulated for immense personal gains by tricksters.

The young fellow, who purportedly had previous experience of driving, did not manifest even average skill of maneuvering a car on the very first day itself. But the urgency of the hour prompted us to give him a month’s time to pick up the requisite abilities on the job. The boy did pick up a lot but at the expense of my car which gradually turned into a plaything in his hands.

He also had behavioural issues which we attributed to his rustic and a dysfunctional family background. He had lost his mother as a kid. His father did not bother much about the siblings. It was upon him to marry his sister off to a good family. To perform all these responsibilities he needed money and consequently a job. Needless to say, we were readily taken in by his tragic story and soon enfolded him under our umbrella of care and concern.

In the meanwhile, my mother’s health deteriorated. Her memory kept failing giving way to profound dementia. It was an ailment we did not know much about. We were gathering experience each day the hard way.

During this time I too suffered from memory lapses and could not remember small details like whether I had paid for the packet of milk I had told my driver to get from the Dairy. Often he would return the money saying that I had already paid him. But till date I am unsure whether it was attention deficit on my part or this was his way of making in-roads into our trust turf till we could swear by his innocence and trustworthiness without a morsel of doubt.  

Then small mishaps started occurring – a missing car stereo, a misplaced Tupperware, small sums of money vanishing from the purse….we gave him the benefit of doubt! The sunny side of the story was that in the meantime the boy’s sister got married, some land disputes were settled off and his overall demeanour had the aura of flourishing prosperity. To my extreme naivety, my magnanimous monetary contribution in achieving all these milestones of his life grew beyond his repaying capacity.  With it grew his tantrums. However, when accosted he would sob inconsolably giving excuses of onerous familial pressure. I had this niggling suspicion that he took advantage of his association with a respectable family as a means to attain nefarious ends. The disappearance of money became more frequent and larger in amount. At this juncture, it became quite clear that his instincts were not on the right side of law. He was beyond redemption and our endeavor to rectify him was in vain.

By now my mother was completely bedridden. I was her sole caregiver. My elder sister was a great support. But she got busy settling my nephews who were at the threshold of leaving the nest. The driver had now become a veritable security threat to the household. Finally, we had no other option but to throw him out of the job.

Adversities and adversaries wizen one beyond imagination. As I share this life episode I relive my mistakes. First and foremost, a thorough antecedent check, by way of police verification and/or personal investigation should have been undertaken. Proof of identification and residence should have been verified and a copy of the same retained. Additionally, a close watch on him on regular basis was necessary to gauge his intent since he was a new entrant to the household. A police complaint at the very first attempt at thievery would have acted as an alert signal if not a deterrent for the miscreant. Security cameras inside and outside should have been a precondition to deploying a new comer. Habitual reliance on monetary help other than salary should be discouraged and only extended, if at all imperative, against a collateral and involving a mutually known guarantor for any future eventuality.

Later I did lodge a police complaint and a subsequent FIR about the thefts. The police cautioned the boy not to venture near our premise thereafter but the closure of the case was never intimated even after several follow-ups. I have got security cameras installed inside my home now.

Wisdom gained on hindsight – adherence to established procedures and safeguard measures to counter any event of breach of security is our own responsibility. However, preempting breach of trust remains a debatable issue. Surprisingly, notwithstanding the enormity of support that we were readily making available to him, the boy still thought it appropriate and convenient to take recourse to criminal methods to satiate his appetite for material aspirations which were seemingly endless.

All Pics from Google

Posted by on December 19, 2022 in A PROTEST A LAMENT and tagged , , , , , , , .

8 Comments

December 6, 2022

SHADOW PLAY


Posted by on December 6, 2022 in MY PHOTO BLOG and tagged , , , .

2 Comments

September 14, 2022

Yummilicioussss


Dinner arrived as per pre-ordered menu on 8th September 2022 well packaged and absolutely on time between 7.00 and 8.00 PM by Uber.

The Menu was

https://panaecea.wordpress.com

However, I had chosen only Fish Kalia and Chicken Korma as I was having this irresistible urge for non-vegetarian khana, especially fish. Needless to say, they were very well cooked – Bengali or Bong style. I still cannot get over the Kalia. The fish was very, very fresh. The pieces were huge. The gravy did not have any “fishy” smell ( I was very specific about that).

We are small eaters. For us, one plate was more than sufficient. The Chicken was all soft and juicy. I relished the silkiness of the creamy cashew garnish all over the sumptuous chicken pieces interweaved with the sweetness of the deeply fried barista – just the right combo for the palate. I love barista. It adds another dimension to any dish – be it Biryani or Chicken. Again the quantity served/packed for one could suffice four eaters like us.

Kalia was all spices (rich with garam masala) which it is meant to be. In Indian cuisine, garam masala is a mixture of cardamom, cinnamon, bay leaf and clove ground to a powder. These are just the minimum ingredients. Some add cumin seeds, black pepper, nut meg and mace also to it to make it more flavourful, rich and tasty. To put it succinctly, when we Bongs cook fish with onion, garlic, ginger and tomato paste, the outcome is akin to Kalia. There could be more to it but my limited culinary knowledge can define the dish only in this simplistic way.

I have stopped preparing Non-veg at home for various reasons. When I have a biological thirst for it, I either order it through Zomato or ask my sister to make it. So, this was a treat for which I had to wait for three months as Tapatie had left for the US of A for a short vacation. Before leaving she apologized several times for not being able to satiate my taste buds and I kept on assuring her that the apology was quite unnecessary.

But what I actually want to emphasize here is the personal care she took once she confirmed the order. She was very particular about the oil and spice level, whether I was allergic to any ingredient, at what time I ate dinner, what would be the convenient delivery time since I reach home late from office and once the packets were delivered she reconfirmed over phone whether I have got them without any glitch or not. I am not so used to being taken care of. I was really touched. She also confessed how bad she felt when she had to refuse my order three months back because she was in a hurry to leave for abroad. Again, she was not required to but that is Tapatie.

A little about her. She is my childhood buddy’s neighbour and friend. So, a friend’s friend is of course a friend. Tapatie left a high profile corporate job to follow her passion which is cooking. Those who can chuck off stressful, demotivating, mere money making careers and achieve their dreams, which may be less profitable earning-wise but high in soul satisfaction quotient, they are, I believe, the luckiest persons on this earth.

I have met her just once. But I saw a motherly side to her during our interaction – the way she cared for littlest of things to heighten the comfort level of those she catered to. She even offered to deliver a suitable vegetarian meal for my mother which was really very, very sweet of her.

Unfortunately, I am going through a restrictive phase off spicy stuff and desperately waiting for a nod from my GP to again start hogging as ever.

Till then, I have to do with salivating over the pics I took as Tapatie’s delicacies arrived and unpacked hurriedly and impatiently. Here they are:

Fish Kalia :

https://panaecea.wordpress.com

Chicken Korma :

https://panaecea.wordpress.com

Don’t they look yummilicious????

Posted by on September 14, 2022 in MY FOOD BLOG and tagged , , , , .

3 Comments

September 8, 2022

She


She was married off

Before attaining puberty
At sixteen she flaunted a baby bump
At twenty she was mother of two
In between got aborted twice
In some sleazy clinic
                          alley side

That year…

When “Nirbhaya” uproar
                           was at its peak
She laughed quietly, and one day
                                    said to me
I get  raped  night after night
No one is going to burn a candle for me right?
Who is going to protest against that ?

An afterthought….

Perhaps one day they will make a film on me
And immortalize my agony frame by frame

Then after second thought…..

Who is she? where is she from?
After all a name is just a name
Be it rose…………………….be it shame

Posted by on September 8, 2022 in A PROTEST A LAMENT and tagged , , , , , .

8 Comments

September 8, 2022

Hauling Happiness Home


I love chocolates. Who doesn’t? They are happiness inducers, delicious to taste, come in lot of varieties and part of all festive occasions. Every country has its indigenous recipe of making chocolates. When you are down, you should munch a piece of chocolate to up your mood. Wiki says that chocolate making dates back to 1750 BC. Can you beat that?

So, when I saw this Happiness Carriage on road while going back home from office I could not help but click. I love the tag line too – äs pure as your love. So the status of that brown bar is escalated to sublimity. What else one would want?………So don’t forget to bite into one as soon as you get an opportunity.

Posted by on September 8, 2022 in Uncategorized.

6 Comments

August 21, 2022

A Trip To Vietnam


No…no….no… friends you all are very wrong. In fact, the caption is very, very misleading. The trip was not undertaken by me but by my nephew and niece-in-law. Why Vietnam? I am yet to ask them. But its my nephew’s second trip to the country. What pulls him to that land I am not very sure. But this time they shared a lot of information which I am not very sure will be likeable to all. It was not to many of my family members.

Wiki says that Vietnam has now become a very popular travel destination. Its a country where I think vegetarians will not be very comfortable as most of the dishes served are non-vegetarian. Vietnamese serve a wide range of wines which includes snake wine, centipede wine (not for humans), rice wine etc.. Serving snake wine to guests is, I suppose, a delicacy. My nephew visited a friend where they were served wine from a glass jar. The jar was filled with wine and had a dead cobra preserved in it wrapped around ginseng (see pic above). Ginseng is good for health. It boosts energy, lowers blood sugar and cholesterol levels, reduces stress, promotes relaxation, treats diabetes. Snake bite is supposed to be height of intoxication. So, presumably, the dead snake must be adding to the level of intoxication to the wine. Centipede wine, on the other hand, is given to animals to treat them of diseases. They also visited a winery which was owned by a Vietnam war veteran. He had got one leg amputated as an aftermath of the war. But still he would visit the jungles to catch Cobras, kill them and bring them back to the winery for wine making.

https://panaecea.wordpress.com

It was quite yucky listening to such preparations as we Indians do not believe in including insects and reptiles in our culinary. In fact, most of us enjoy vegetarian dishes mostly. However, apart from such weird but novel facts about Vietnamese cuisine, I was told that the country was very clean and had scenic spots.

https://panaecea.wordpress.com
https//panaecea.wordpress.com
https//panaecea.wordpress.com
https//panaecea.wordpress.com
https//panaecea.wordpress.com
https//panaecea.wordpress.com
https//panaecea.wordpress.com
https//panaecea.wordpress.com
https:panaecea.wordpress.com
https://panaecea.wordpress.com
https://panaecea.wordpress.com
https://panaecea.wordpress.com

And that’s my globe trotting nephew and beautiful niece-in-law who are real adventurous types ready to enjoy every new experience from sipping snake wine to tasting super expensive coffee made out of animal defecation. Yuck!! You read me right. They actually made me drink a cup too but told me later what it was made up of. Well I was feeling not so okay after that but my niece told me that it was all in the mind which made me feel slightly better.

All the pics have of course been taken by my nephew and niece-in-law and they generously let me post them in my blog.

Posted by on August 21, 2022 in TRAVELOGUE and tagged , , , .

9 Comments

August 17, 2022

I Am In No Hurry


Mr. A is my insignificant neighbor. Insignificant why? Simply because kinds of him do not have much to contribute to the historicity of human existence. He is a quiet and self effacing member of the society who chooses to lead a typically middle-class life torn between desires and destiny. His florid countenance is always awash with a shy smile. I have never heard him raise his voice. He is neither into unconventional trends nor controversy. His speech is soft and eyes downcast (especially while addressing ladies). A little hesitant with a tendency to escape when it comes to formidable situations. In short, Mr. A is a thorough gentleman.

Now that brings me to an unpleasant discourse on gentlemanliness. Who is a gentleman? They are a minority who live life in constant dread because neither do they have the muscle power nor unaccounted monetary resources to snatch away from others what they think is their right. That’s an anomaly, isn’t it? Going by the books, honesty should have a stronger voice and say in society. Success and prosperity should chase them relentlessly. But is it so? My boss was an honest person but could never assert himself like the way the rogues in the office could. As a result, he kept to himself and advised us likewise – a paragon of forgiveness – which I am really undecided to categorize as a virtue. Needless to say, his career never took off the way it should have.

You may ask from where have I lifted this unique definition of a gentleman. No, this is not written in any tome or scripture. Sadly, it is the realistic caricature of the species – a dying one at that. Society by itself has gifted us with certain yardsticks, however inherently contradictory, these may be. In order to be civilized you forgo your right to survive because survival calls for bloody battles the civilized is not accustomed to win. Mind it, here I am not talking about fighting it out. I am talking about proving one’s mettle which in itself is debatable. Victory does not fall straight into the lap of the one who follows the righteous path. Rather one has to *prove* that one is worthy of a win by hook or by crook. That is why, in this rowdy race, the gentleman, the epitome of a civilized being, fast heads towards extinction.

Coming back to Mr. A , I consider him an exception of sorts. Not because of his inbred qualities but because he sails through life with an ease which is enviable. The other day we met in the Diwali Dhamaka Bazaar. After exchange of a few pleasantries he gently reminded me of a few documents which he had given me to get attested on an urgent basis. I had done the needful but returning him the same had just slipped off my memory. I apologized to which he shook his head vehemently and replied, “Didi, I am in no hurry. You can give me back those papers whenever you get time” I knew how important and immediate his requirement was yet those five words “I am in no hurry” shook me up to the core the way it always does.

These are the five words which Mr. A is habituated of reiterating to whosoever it may be not because it figures as his favourite speech but because he genuinely believes in it. Sometimes I wonder whether it is his docility which is his undoing. He has had his rough patches. Life is never a bed of roses. Not for him at least. I can make that out from the way he vies with adversities off and on in the hope of a better day. Sometimes, I wonder whether he has compromised with life for good. At others, his unhurried approach gives an inkling of a larger acceptance , a greater tenacity, a worthier forbearance which I am not and will never be capable of.

In today’s space-rocketing life, Mr. A has found his own orbit irrespective of how many days and nights it takes to complete a circle. Mr. A rests like a freezing glacier in the midst of a turbulent typhoon.

My love-hate relationship with life shall never allow me to think or live life as Mr. A does however inspired it may feel to be. Yet it never stops me to ponder how Mr. A must feel when a posh Jaguar zips past his exhausted Alto 800 on road. Well, I am sure, he’ll sedately change gear and mutter, “I am in no hurry, sir. You first.”

🙂

🙂



This post is based on an article written in my Bangla Blog the link to which is given below for those who wish to read the original

https://vanderloost.blogspot.com/2013/10/blog-post.html

Posted by on August 17, 2022 in HUMOUR and tagged , , .

9 Comments